Sociopathic neighbours

Barnet council announced a scheme called "Adopt a Street". The idea is that you pick up litter and leaves in your street and in return the council gives you....extra garbage bags. How creative a way of boosting council services at no extra cost to the taxpayer. Well I don't need to foster my sidewalk, I can sweep leaves without a process. But a neighbour stands between me and my community service. He does not live on my street. He lives round the corner and is universally reviled for his asbo-inducing behaviour. For 10 years now his wheeze as been to park his smelly, dilapidated car outside our house and leave it there for months on end. Short of stabbing his tyres, which I am far too British to do, he is unshiftable. Polite notes, visits to his house, have yielded nothing. Confrontation, we have discovered, actually makes him even more intractable. He parks his car to create a fight. Well, I think as I sweep leaves, the indefinite residence of his car surely makes him an honorary resident of our street, and as such, he can do his share of street adopting. I gather up the leaves, about a tonne of them. I dump them on top of his car. I survey the scene. There are no more leaves on the sidewalk. And the sociopath's car can no longer be seen. This is a win-win. I go inside and shut the door.